Being someone that doesnt travel abroad that often my passport upon returning from my last raiding party to Spain was promptly deposited in a safe place in our home, safe and easily found (or so I thought)!
We had no intention of going abroad this year as things were a bit tight financially but cousin Heidi had suggested a break at his Spanish farm, wifey thought this a great idea and promptly pulled her passport out of her underwear drawer (dont ask), gleefully telling me she was ready and could I find my passport to make sure it was still in date. Not a problem I thought, well thats a lie because thinking about it I had no idea where I had secretly squirrelled away my passport.
A quick search of my desk drawer (everything lives in here) revealed nothing, removal of the drawer and emptying the contents onto the bed resulted in the same nothing, checking the myriad of pockets on the rucksack I had used on the last trip yeilded the same result apart from the bonus of finding a sealed packet of duty free cigarettes from the last away stay…. panic was beginning to settle in at this point, not because I had lost the passport but because I had to tell wifey whom I had mercilessly taken the mickey out of for hiding her passport in her underwear drawer that muggins here couldnt even remember where his safely hidden passport was….
You just know how much trouble your in when nothing is said, the less thats said the deeper in the mire you are…. complete silence was a bad sign, over the next couple of weeks the whole house was turned upside down, even the loft was emptied (found cousin Heidi’s book I borrowed a few years ago) but no passport, I had given up after my initial search but Sherlock Holmes was desparate to find the passport and have a triumphant gloat but even she failed, failed to find it but not to rub it in how easily hers was located and let EVERYONE know how safe and easily found her bloody passport was…
So, I found online the governments site for reporting lost passports, and started to fill it out, who comes up with the questions for reporting your passport lost?
Question: Date you lost your passport…. now you can only input one date (day,month and year) thats pretty specific for something that has remained hidden for two years
Question: Place of loss… Surely if I knew this then my passport isnt lost? I didnt put that just “in the home”
Question: Circumstances of loss…. Now somebody wanted me to mention it wasnt kept in her underwear drawer so it was my fault, I opted for just “misplaced”
Online form submitted, just had to wait for the form to be posted back and I could sign it and include a new passport application and bobs your uncle!
Even filling out the new application form I managed to screw up, after getting a friend to fill out her details swearing she had known me for years etc and signing my mugshot (photo) all done with care to make sure everything was correct I managed to sign my name and a small fraction of my signature touched the box it was written in and the kind person at the Post Office informed us that it would be sent back because of the smallest overlapping of my signature with the signature box, honestly it was so minute you would have needed a microscope to notice… First form binned and second form taken through the same process but this time somebody managed to get his squiggle within the box confines (ahem)
So yesterday I get a letter informing me my lost passport had been cancelled and the new one would arrive shortly, this morning another letter to say the new passport has been posted, and then an hour later the passport turns up… couldnt have cut down on postage and paperwork and sent it all in one letter then?
So passport is here and apparently safely hidden in her highnesses underwear drawer, done with large guestures just to make sure I understood that wifey knows where safe is…. in her underwear bloody drawer!!!
I have just crawled from my bed to my computer (in agony I hasten to add) to share with you my disappointment at my wifes purchase. In agony, because I managed to pull a muscle in my lower back whilst trying to correct a full shopping trolley with a mind of its own whilst shopping this morning (I kid you not).
I am seriously considering lobbying my local MP to force all Supermarkets to put there shopping trolleys through a yearly MOT with random spot checks to check they run in a straight line and they dont have that random wheel that chatters all the way around the store.
I expect the trolley I had this morning was either the one that has been recovered from the town river (every town has at least one trolley in its river) or its the one the six drunk lads on Saturday night thought would be the perfect vehicle to get there buddy home in as he had passed out an hour previously and they could no longer carry him. Or its the trolley that the local bag lady had been using to cart her worldly belongings around in, she having just traded it in for a newer model due to the fact this one pulls to the right.
Whatever the reason I think we should take some of our overweight policemen (and women) out of their cars (and doughnut shops) and have them doing random trolley checks in all supermarkets to ensure the safety of all shoppers, actually I might go one step further and start a petition on the Governments website!
Right thats off my chest now onto my wifes latest purchase that has brought disappointment and may yet lead to a divorce. She has just driven to the shops to buy a product that I consider pointless, stupid and the height of laziness, no not a toothless comb.
I can hardly bring myself to say this but she has just bought some ice cubes, how lazy is that? Not only is water from our tap free ( well cheap) its just the fact she could not go through the motion of filling the ice cube trays with water and wait for them to freeze (in the freezer I add) its the type of thing I expect my daughter to buy, along with her grated cheese and frozen mashed potato and ready made gravy!
I can see us as humans dying out as a race in the near future, or at the least losing the ability to think, if we cant be bothered to do the simple things like mash potatoes or freeze some water to make ice cubes then I pray for us all!
Think I may look for all the lazy products whilst hopping next week to see how lazy as a race we have become.
On a side note who is the genius that came up with the idea of selling ice cubes, grated cheese etc and I use the word genius in a sarcastic tone, are Supermarkets using primary school kids as their focus groups now as thats something you just know a 4 year old has come up with.
Expect to see bottled water on shelves near you soon!
Technorati Tags: lobbying my local MP, shopping trolleys, MOT, overweight policemen, height of laziness
Just some figures I came across detailing the prevalence of Parkinsons Disease in Europe.
Prevalence of Parkinson’s disease in Europe
The statistics are based on different studies carried out in the countries between 2000 - 2008.
Austria 16,226
Belgium 22,807
Cyprus 1,084
Czech Republic 18,411
Denmark 10,355
Estonia 2,773
Finland 10,309
France 117,093
Germany 260,817
Greece 23,439
Hungary 20,223
Iceland 436
Ireland 5,691
Italy 199,048
Latvia 4,767
Lithuania 6,574
Luxembourg 811
Malta 637
Netherlands 28,725
Norway 8,771
Poland 63,178
Portuga l22,387
Slovakia 8,036
Slovenia 3,791
Spain 151,019
Sweden 17,629
Switzerland 14,691
UK 119,264
Technorati Tags: prevalence of Parkinsons Disease in Europe, Parkinson’s disease
Monday 20th April 2009 see`s the start of Parkinsons Awareness Week here in the UK, it should be a week where were shouting from the rooftops about our condition, a week when the leading charity in the UK for PD should be seen on as many Tv shows, news programmes etc bringing our plight to an indifferent public… a chance to raise the profile of Parkinsons Disease but alas I am expecting the same non-event as previous years.
Does the UK`s leading Parkinsons Disease charity not understand how to use the power of 21st century advertising?
This week would be the best week of the year to spend some of their budget releasing an advert about Parkinsons and run with it all week at least, and maybe they could consider.. nay should consider highlighting the fact that ten percent of new cases of Parkinsons Disease are actually young people, and were tired of being forgotten, tired of having no voice and tired of people in this day and age not being able to accept that young people can also suffer from PD!!
Not so long ago my youngest son returned home from school very upset, it took us a while to calm him down and find out what the problem was, it turns out the teacher had gone around the class asking what everyones father did, various job descriptions were given from his classmates and the teacher coo`ed at each answer. When it came to my sons turn and he told the class that his dad no longer worked as he had Parkinsons, the teacher called him stupid and said “everyone knows Parkinsons is an old persons disease”. And that was the end of it, my son humiliated by an adults ignorance of Parkinsons Disease!
Personally I wanted to march right down to the school and tear this “teacher” a new asshole, the air had turned blue with a torrent of expletives expressing my view of this teachers ignorance but wifey put a stop to that (she`s no fun sometimes) and reasoned that I would be banging my head against a wall and possibly making my sons life at school a misery..so it was left that my son learned some new swear words and the word “ignorant”.
So maybe the charity should concoct an ad showing a younger person with PD and maybe this would help dispell some of the ignorance in this country towards PD!
Its time the Parkinsons Disease Society woke up to the fact there is a growing army of younger people with Parkinsons, unhappy with their lack of a voice and tired of being an after thought!
Maybe when they start to understand and actively give us a voice, a say in our future then I will consider supporting them.
Parkinsons Disease week is a week for raising awareness of Parkinsons not a week to crow about the past as they seem to be gearing up to do, and I quote “We will use this week to launch the Parkinsons Disease Societies 40th anniversary which will focus on our research achievements”, looking back not looking forward!
Technorati Tags: Parkinsons Awareness Week, PD, Parkinsons Disease, Does the UK`s leading Parkinsons Disease charity not understand how to use the power of 21st century advertising?, ten percent of new cases of Parkinsons Disease are actually young people, humiliated by an adults ignorance of Parkinsons Disease